Friday, July 29, 2011

Benefits of Family Dinners (and that after dinner walk around the block)

I am not sure why this post came out underlined.  I couldn't get rid of it so please ignore it!



We are all aware of the benefits of happy family mealtimes.  I have included  an article here that gives 6 reasons whey the family dinner is an essential family activity.  Why not add to that family time with an after dinner walk through the neighborhood.  A stroll after dinner gives parents and children time to observe their surroundings and enjoy each other's company.  It aids in digestion and will help adults and children get a better night's sleep.  Try it now that the sun is up longer and summer is a more leisurely time of year.  Make this a habit, you won't regret it.



Family Dinners Support Healthy Habits - Photo by Flickr.com User eyeliam, CC License


Many studies show that eating family dinners together is one of the most effective ways for parents to help their children do better in school and in life.
Research shows that the more often children eat with their parents, and the happier and more structured these mealtimes are, the better the children perform in a variety of life arenas.
Six Reaons Why Family Dinner is an Essential Family Activity
Children who take part in family dinner at least five times a week do better than other children in at least six important ways:
1. Children who Eat Family Dinners Eat More Healthy Foods, Fewer Junk Foods and Sodas
Children in families that eat dinner together eat more fruits, vegetables, grains and calcium-rich foods. They also drink fewer soft drinks, whose connection with obesity has been documented in numerous studies.
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2. Family Meals Create Stronger Connections between Children and Parents
A survey of 1,000 teens by the National Center Addiction and Drug Abuse at Columbia University found that nearly half thought dinnertime was the best time to talk to their parents about something important. More than 80% of the teens in the same survey said they preferred having dinner with their families to eating alone.
3. Children who Talk at the Table Build Larger Vocabularies
The Home-School Study of Language and Literacy Development, a joint project between Harvard's Graduate School of Education and Clark University, found that the discussions that take place at the dinner table are important to children’s speech development. Lively discussions of current events or explanations make a bigger contribution to children’s vocabularies than just saying “Pass the peas.”
4. They Get Better Grades in School
Studies conducted at Columbia University also found that teens who ate regular frequent family dinners were 40% more likely to get A’s and B’s in school than teenagers whose families ate separately.
Read This Next
5. They Develop Fewer Eating Disorders
Researchers at the University of Minnesota found that adolescents who reported that their families made family dinners a high priority and maintained a positive atmosphere at dinnertime were less likely to engage in self-induced vomiting, use of laxatives, diet pills or diuretics.
One study found that for girls, eating 3-4 family meals per week cut the risk of extreme weight control behaviors in half, while families who ate together five or more times a week reduced the risk of eating disorders in their daughters by 66%. The positive effects were stronger for girls than for boys.
6. They Engage in Fewer Risky Behaviors
The University of Minnesota researchers also found that teens who had family dinners five or more times a week were 42% less likely to drink alcohol, 59% less likely to smoke cigarettes, and 66% less likely to try marijuana.
Even a Few Family Dinners a Week Pay Off
Making the effort to carve out even one or two evenings a week for family mealtime pays off in the form of better outcomes for children. "Kids who eat more family dinners do better than those who eat a few,” says Miriam Weinstein of the National Center Addiction and Drug Abuse. “Kids who share a few dinners weekly do better than the ones who have none at all."

Monday, July 25, 2011

healthy recipe

Here is a healthy and delicious recipe to try with your kids:
From http://www.eatingwell.com/recipes_menus/collections/healthy_cookie_recipes


Healthy Peanut Butter Cookies

Editor's note:
I made these yesterday with the following modifications. They turned out terrific!  
·         used 5/8 cup white whole wheat flour 
·         added 1/4 cup packed natural brown sugar
·         did not add cinnamon
·         used quick cook oats and unsalted peanut butter
·         added 1/3 cup of 60% dark chocolate chips
·         scooped 2" balls and flattened the top of the cookie
These cookies had a crispy crust and a wonderfully chewy center.  I think the brown sugar helped give it that texture.  They reminded me of commercially baked cookies that you might enjoy at a coffee house. Love them! Thanks again for contributing another great recipe!

Ingredients:
Dry Stuff 
·         3/4 c whole wheat flour ( I used a little less, adjust depending on the moisture of the batter) 
·         3/4 c oats 
·         1/2 tsp salt 
·         1/2 tsp baking soda 
·         optional: 1 tsp cinnamon 
Moist Stuff 
·         1 c smooth natural peanut butter ( I used 1 ¼ cups) 
·         1/2 c honey (easier with liquid honey) 
·         1 egg 
·         2 tsp vanilla 
·         optional: 1/3-1/2 c chocolate or carob chips
Preparation:
1.    Combine dry ingredients
2.    Combine moist ingredients
3.    Mix dry and moist ingredients together. 
4.    Cool in the fridge for 20 minutes. 
5.    Drop teaspoons of batter on a parchment-lined cookie sheet or baking sheet for cookies. 
6.    Flatten with a fork if you like. 
7.    Bake at 375 for 8-12 minutes - edges will be slightly browned - be careful not to burn as honey browns fast.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

I'm Bored! The Summer Vacation Blues

Midsummer is often the time when children start asking, "When do I go back to school?  I'm bored!"

If your child is feeling this way and you don't have any vacation plans or camp plans coming up, then it is time for Mommy Camp!

Personally, I think summer vacation is too long for elementary aged children.  Teachers need to spend 4 to 6 weeks reviewing material that was presented in the last school year because children haven't used these skills for 10 to 12 weeks.

If summer vacation was shortened to 6 weeks and there were a few more week long breaks during the year, children would retain more knowledge, not need to spend so much time reviewing, and therefore have more time to spend on new lessons.

I am all for year round schools.  How do you feel about it?

Here is an article from Web MD that talks about ideas for children of different ages.

Summer Fun for Kids
School's out, and your kids want to have some fun in the sun. How can you keep them happy and busy -- and maybe help them learn something -- all the way through August?
By Heather Hatfield
WebMD Feature
School's out, the long days of summer are upon us, and your kids are restless. Short of shipping them off to summer camp, how can you keep them happy and busy, and without letting them catch on, make sure they're learning along the way?
Here are tips on what to keep in mind when you're planning summer activities, as well as some easy ideas for little tykes, preschoolers, and school kids that will keep them entertained all the way through August.
Let Summer Begin
When the thermometer starts to creep upward, the first thing you should consider when planning playtime is safety.
"I think with all age groups, parents should consider safety first," says Barbara Roth, specialty consultant for child care for the YMCA of the USA.
With safety in mind, ask yourself, what activities are appropriate for your child's age? What safety equipment should you have on hand, such as a lifejacket if you have a pool, or training wheels and a helmet if your child wants to learn to ride a bike? Will you be home with the child, or working? If you're working, is an adult present?
"Kids should never be home alone, so make sure they're under adult supervision if you will be working," says Roth.
Second, what are your goals for your kids during the summer?
"Beyond simply keeping them busy, you want to keep their development in mind and realize how much learning goes on in play," says Roth.
Learning doesn't stop the moment the school bell sounds for the last time in June. Kids keep on learning all summer long.
"Kids also need to work on social-emotional skills, which is ongoing for all age groups," says Roth. "Make sure the activities your kids are involved in include kids their own age as well as kids other ages."
And last, remember that there is only so much time in the day -- don't overbook yourself and your kids so that summer vacation doesn't include a moment's rest.
"Eliminate stress," says Michele Borba, EdD, author of 19 books on parenting and childhood. "A big, huge calendar on your fridge that can help you keep track of everyone's schedule is a gold mine and really helps avoid overbooking. And make sure there are fun active things going on and also some laid-back activities. It's OK to have nothing to do, to spend some time in the sandbox."
Toddlers
Toddlers, ages 1-2, require constant supervision. Whether you are home with your child or another adult is supervising, these activities will help your kids have fun in the sun.
Bins of fun. "Get some plastic bins and fill them with fun things, and rotate which bin your child gets every day," says Borba. "Use paper towel tubes and toilet paper tubes in one bin, which are great for toddlers to use as kazoos and drums. Put play dough in another bin and let them play with that for a while. And old paint brushes with just water are great -- toddlers can paint anything and watch the water change its color, and there's no pick up for you after."
On a warm summer day, take the bins outside and spend some time playing in the shade -- when the bins get boring, take advantage of nature by showing your toddler flowers, playing in the sandbox, or swinging on the jungle gym.
Book time. "Reading is such a great activity for all ages," says Borba. "For toddlers, have book time where you sit down and read for a half hour or so. Point to the pictures and tell your child what it is, and after reading it a few times, it's amazing how fast they'll pick it up and start saying it with you."
Read books to your toddler that have pictures of things you'll find outside in the summer -- butterflies, flowers, birds, frogs, bees, anything under the sun. Your toddler will know the names of Mother Nature's creations before summer is over.
Swimming lessons. "Swimming lessons are great for toddlers as young as 2 or 3," says Ken Haller, MD, assistant professor of pediatrics at St. Louis University School of Medicine in Missouri. "And your whole family can enjoy this activity."
While swimming lessons for toddlers is a good way to beat the heat and introduce them to water, remember that children this age should never be left alone around pools. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, "teaching your child how to swim DOES NOT mean your child is safe in water," especially toddlers.
Classic pastimes. Games of old are great inside, but even better outside in the summer. "There are very simple games toddlers really enjoy, like duck duck goose and ring around the rosey," says Roth. "Toddlers also love tunnels and forts -- you can either buy them or make them out of cushions and blankets. And if you're ready for some noise, give your toddler pots and pans to play with, or go for a quieter version, and give them Tupperware."
Preschoolers
From ants on a log to chalk on a sidewalk, here are ideas that will keep kids 3-5 happy all summer long.
Simple kitchen projects. "Projects with preschoolers in the kitchen are always supervised and simple," says Roth. "Make ants on a log using celery, peanut butter, and raisins, and let the child do most of the work -- they'll love it."
Other simple preschooler projects for the kitchen: trail mix, apples and peanut butter, and for a hot summer day treat, ice cream sandwiched by cookies.
Arts and crafts. "Drawing with lots of different papers is a great activity for preschool kids," says Roth. "Give them different kinds of markers, pens, pencils, finger paint, chalk, and chalk paint."
Let kids paint to their heart's content outside on the grass to make cleanup easy, and let them use paper, cardboard, driveways, and sidewalks as their canvases -- your little Picassos will be busy for hours.

"Popsicle sticks and Legos are also great," says Roth. "Let them experiment with building and creating new things, which will keep them happy and help their development skills."
Green thumbs. "Give your child a small spade, a small piece of earth, and talk to him about the different flowers he can plant," says Roth. "Over the summer, he can watch it grow and it's a great project for your child -- and for you."
Projects like this can unknowingly be turned into a science-math-English project. Help your child look up the scientific name of the plant in the encyclopedia, and when the plant starts to sprout, have your child measure it every day, and keep a journal on how much it grows and changes over the summer.
Day trips. "With kids this age, and older kids, get a feel for what they're interested in at the start of summer," says Haller. "Take them to museums, parks, the zoo, and wander around and gauge what their summer activities might be based on their interests. And over the course of the summer, you can do more day trips that relate to the things they enjoy."
School Kids
Kids 5-12 are more independent, and many of the activities that might keep them amused over the summer months might also fit for younger children if an adult lends a hand.
Journal entries. "One really cool activity is journaling," says Roth. "Older kids can write in their journal, and younger kids can draw. Parents can get an attractive journal, colorful pens and pencils, and give your kids some quiet time when they can journal on a recommended topic."
From their favorite summer vacation to their favorite school subject, kids will write and draw about anything.
"The cool thing is it can be a private thing, or it can be group -- your kids can share what they write, but leave that up to them," says Roth. "This activity helps build self-awareness, as well as writing and reading skills while they're away from school in the summer."
Scavenger hunt. "Go on a scavenger hunt," says Roth. "Get a book out of the library with different trees pictured in it and see how many you can find in your neighborhood, keeping safety first. Give small prizes with everyone winning something."
Rainy summer days. "For the rainy afternoon when it's not thundering, there are lots of outdoor activities that kids love," says Roth.
For instance, propose a science project, Roth tells WebMD: Have them predict how much rain is going to come down during the day. In the morning, put a measuring cup outside and have them track rainfall amounts -- once at noon, once at 3 p.m., and once at 5 p.m. With several kids, award prizes for who comes the closest, who has the highest guess, the lowest, and the farthest away, so everyone wins.
"Popsicle sticks and Legos are also great," says Roth. "Let them experiment with building and creating new things, which will keep them happy and help their development skills."
Green thumbs. "Give your child a small spade, a small piece of earth, and talk to him about the different flowers he can plant," says Roth. "Over the summer, he can watch it grow and it's a great project for your child -- and for you."
Projects like this can unknowingly be turned into a science-math-English project. Help your child look up the scientific name of the plant in the encyclopedia, and when the plant starts to sprout, have your child measure it every day, and keep a journal on how much it grows and changes over the summer.
Day trips. "With kids this age, and older kids, get a feel for what they're interested in at the start of summer," says Haller. "Take them to museums, parks, the zoo, and wander around and gauge what their summer activities might be based on their interests. And over the course of the summer, you can do more day trips that relate to the things they enjoy."
School Kids
Kids 5-12 are more independent, and many of the activities that might keep them amused over the summer months might also fit for younger children if an adult lends a hand.
Journal entries. "One really cool activity is journaling," says Roth. "Older kids can write in their journal, and younger kids can draw. Parents can get an attractive journal, colorful pens and pencils, and give your kids some quiet time when they can journal on a recommended topic."
From their favorite summer vacation to their favorite school subject, kids will write and draw about anything.
"The cool thing is it can be a private thing, or it can be group -- your kids can share what they write, but leave that up to them," says Roth. "This activity helps build self-awareness, as well as writing and reading skills while they're away from school in the summer."
Scavenger hunt. "Go on a scavenger hunt," says Roth. "Get a book out of the library with different trees pictured in it and see how many you can find in your neighborhood, keeping safety first. Give small prizes with everyone winning something."
Rainy summer days. "For the rainy afternoon when it's not thundering, there are lots of outdoor activities that kids love," says Roth.
For instance, propose a science project, Roth tells WebMD: Have them predict how much rain is going to come down during the day. In the morning, put a measuring cup outside and have them track rainfall amounts -- once at noon, once at 3 p.m., and once at 5 p.m. With several kids, award prizes for who comes the closest, who has the highest guess, the lowest, and the farthest away, so everyone wins.


Friday, July 22, 2011

Great lunch box on Yubo

Hey Moms and Dads
Check out this environmentally friendly, dishwasher safe lunch box!  I am recommending this for those of you who want a great product.

http://getyubo.com/pages/features.html

I love this product

EPA free, and comes with an icepack and reusable containers.    There are lots of choices too.  This is the first product I am recommending, I hope it won't be the last!
Debbie

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Birthday Fun

Today is my birthday!  Birthdays are an important celebration in a child's life.  They mark milestones and represent trips on planet earth around the sun.

There are many ways to celebrate a child's birthday.  Parties for children should be centered around their interests.  One girl I know wanted to have a party with an animal theme.  She loved animals and wanted all of her friends to share in her interests.  Her mom gave her a "princess" party.  Her daughter was disappointed but said to me, "Maybe next year my mom will listen to me."

This broke my heart.  So I recommend discussing the options with your child before choosing a "theme".
Parties do not have to be elaborate with entertainers, rented bounce houses, and catered food.  Children want to play games, eat cake and ice cream, do crafts, and have fun.


Here is an idea for a party for children who like to be in the kitchen.

You will need:
Paper chef hats for each child
the fixings for individual pizzas
unfrosted cupcakes, I suggest making a sheet cake, or purchasing one, and using a biscuit cutter to cut out rounds.  You get a larger individual cupcake.
different colored icings and cupcake toppings, put the icings in squeeze bottles
Optional: plain aprons and fabric paint so each child can decorate their own apron

Invite children over.  Have the table set with a square of aluminum foil for each, a pizza crust (boboli) for each child, and pizza fixings in bowls on the table.  Each child creates their own pizza.

While pizzas are cooking play a game.  Hide and seek or tag if you have an outdoor area.  Freeze Dance is a good game for indoors.  Or children can work on decorating aprons.

When pizzas are ready, it's time to eat.

After pizza, children should help clear the table. This is a good time to open gifts if you want.

 Put out the cupcake decorations and put individual cupcakes on paper plates and have children decorate their own cupcakes.  Take photos of each child with his or her creation.  Sing Happy Birthday and enjoy the cupcakes.

Use the photos in the thank you notes that your child writes for gifts and for coming to celebrate with him or her.

However you and your child choose to celebrate, remember the celebration is about this miracle you call your child.  Take time to enjoy the joy he or she is feeling.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Time for Breakfast

Summer is flying by and soon it will be time for a new school year.  Let's get our children off to a great start.  One way to do that is BREAKFAST!

The word "breakfast" is a compound word that means "break the fast."  By the time children wake up in the morning, it has been 10 to 12 hours since they last had something to eat.  This is the reason that they say breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

I often ask my students what they have eaten for breakfast.  I get many different responses from doughnuts and hot chocolate, to eggs and toast, to nothing.

 Think about what your children eat for breakfast.  ^Think about what you eat for breakfast.  How do you feel if you skip breakfast?  Children who do not eat breakfast may have trouble learning, paying attention, and maintaining appropriate behavior.

The best breakfast choices include protein, complex carbs, and good fats.

How can we combine these 3 components into easy, no fuss, tasty meals? 

  • Low sugar cereal with fruit and milk.
  • Eggs and whole wheat toast, fruit, a glass of milk.
  • Whole wheat frozen blueberry waffle with peanut butter and oj.
  • Whole wheat bagel with cream cheese and oj.
  • Yogurt or cottage cheese and fruit.
  • Oatmeal, with fruit and milk.

The best options do not contain excessive amounts of sugar, corn syrup or corn sugar.  Reading labels is an important part of finding the right breakfast foods.  Anything that ends with the letters "-ose" is a form of sugar.

No breakfast, or high sugar options do not serve your child's physical or learning needs.  However it is okay to give in to these requests once in a while.  Find options your child enjoys and can make himself.

Nutella has been advertised as a "healthy" breakfast food.  Please read the label.  It is mostly sugar and should be served only occasionally.

There are some good breakfast bar options.  These should be eaten with a glass of milk.

Be sure to get 100% juices.  Children do not need added sugar.

Since it is still summertime, try different options and pick 2 or 3 that your children like and then help them  learn to fix it on their own.  Store it in a cabinet that can be easily reached so children can be independent.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Homework? What's the point?

There are many questions parents have about homework.

There are many theories as to the importance, and emphasis placed on homework.

There are many opinions from teachers, students and parents about homework.

What do I think? Well, here it is in a nutshell.

Homework assignments stink!

This is what I believe and have formed an opinion about after observing students and homework over the last 20 + years of teaching.

There are a number of reasons why homework is given.
  • To help reinforce lessons learned in school.
  • So that parents can see what students are working on in class.
  • To encourage responsibility.
  • So that the teacher can assess who understood the lessons given.
  • To study for tests.
"Horsefeathers!" say I.

I know of people who brag about how much homework their children have. To them it is the mark of a rigorously academic school.

So let me pose this question:

If your child goes to a great school, why can't they complete the mastery of subjects during the school day?

How many of you, as parents, have had battles with your child over the completion of homework?
How many of you have had homework interrupt a peaceful family dinner?
How many of you have had to help with homework?
How many of you have had to curtail extra curricular activities because your child has too much homework?
How many times has your child had to stay up late to finish an assignment?

There has got to be a better way.

Many schools and school districts have strict homework policies that require the teacher to assign a certain time period of homework every night.

Many teachers assign workbook pages, practice exercises, and memorization of spelling words. An inspiring and imaginative list, isn't it?
This is a travesty. Children work in class all day long. Should they have to work on homework all night too?

When do they get time to enjoy childhood?

People often say childhood is the best time of your life. How can children enjoy it when they have so many homework assignments hanging over their heads.

My niece who is now an adult has a job that no one could have imagined when she was in elementary school. Because of her amazing parents she was able to use her imagination, think outside the box and develop her own position in a high profile business. She was inspired.

Homework should come from the child who is inspired to learn more about a subject.

INSPIRATION
IMAGINATION
CRITICAL THINKING
SELF DISCOVERY

Students do these things when given a rich cultrual environment.

Homework could be suggested instead of assigned.
Projects like:

  • Invent a new game.
  • Develop a new product for children to use in school.
  • Build a model of your dream home.
  • Create an itinerary for a trip around the world.
  • Write and illustrate a book of your own.
  • Design a car, an outfit, a restaurant, the perfect job.
Now these are homework projects I would have enjoyed!

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Summing up the Benefits of a Montessori Education



This clip from Trevor Eissley expresses the key benefit of being a Montessori student.  As a parent you can seek out Montessori schools in your area.  There are private, charter and public Montessori options.  Some families do it at home. 

Wanting the best for your child is a universal and common hope.  Start children on a path of self discovery and wonder. 

Let me know if this clip inspires you to find a Montessori education for your child.

Friday, July 8, 2011

The Children are our Future



The world is changing more quickly than ever, so are the needs of students and the expectations of parents, higher learning institutions, and employers. How do we meet the instructional and educational goals that will best suit the future?  We are educating students for jobs that do not yet exist.  It will be the imagination of these students that will create the future.

In a practical way we can switch the school schedule to a year round program. Allowing for less time where students forget what they’ve learned and less time having to review, thereby allowing more time for discovering and understanding new concepts.

In an academic way, w should allow students a voice in their education.  Of course they need to learn the basics but they also need to find their passion and be allowed time to pursue it.  Instead of separating schools into age restricted groups, let's form groups that have mutual interests. This would close up gaps between levels and perhaps improve student performance, If there is a plan that carries through the whole school it can be a framework that can be used to evaluate, set goals, and be clear about where a student stands in his or her education.

In a social way, we should implement a school wide program that helps children at all levels change the world. If this is a priority within each class it will carry over to parents and the general population.  Curriculum can be written with practical, social, intellectual, personal, and spiritual goals. We need to impress upon the students that they are caretakers of themselves, the environment, and humanity and that we are globally connected to all living things on the planet. We should provide an education that encourages open hearts, open minds, good judgment, helping hands, and adventurous spirits.

Before Christmas I was in my car, my nephew had just been born. I was listening to “Do you hear what I hear?” The song got to the part that says. A child sleeping through the night, he will bring us goodness and light.

I had an epiphany. It was like I understood the true meaning of every child. When Jesus, or anyone who has positively changed the world, was born, he had choices, temptations, limits, experiences, disappointments, triumphs and hopes. What made him turn out the way he did? (Okay being the son of God may have had a special influence). But what if we looked at each child as if he or she had the power to change the world, to discover something new, to perform a miracle? How do we raise children who fulfill what may be that potential?

Isn’t that what “Follow the child” is about? I love the idea of developing students who will change the world. I believe we do that in a very disjointed way. If we are able to pull together a program that allows each child to fulfill his potential, then we can turn the world into an amazing and hopeful place.

So we need to look at what it takes for a person to be successful. The most successful people have been able to get their message to the public in a clear, inspiring way.  A program that emphasizes communication skills would be essential. Communication can be spoken, written, expressed in terms of art, or music. Communication is not only expression of your point of view, but also understanding of different points of view, and of giving appropriate feedback when calld for. In a world where communication is instantaneous, being an effective communicator becomes essential. We already teach reading, writing, speaking to a group, and allow for expression in each separate class, but let us look at appropriate and effective ways to actively teach communication, interaction and understanding throughout the school program.

Now that I have reread all that I have written, I think what I would like to see most is a more fluent school program across the board. Every class has teachers that were trained in different programs, in order to be effective, Schools can take advantage of the best in each program and create a new voice and by doing so create students who fulfill their potential and change the world.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Value of Community (Classroom or Family) Meetings

I'm back, and I have to say how much I have missed writing everyday!  My computer has a virus and is with the Geek Squad.  It is taking a very long time.  Hopefully, I will get it back soon but for now, I am at school and working on the computer there.

A community is a group of people who share common interests, goals, and who may share a comon space.  In Montessori we always begin with the "big picture" and then look at the pieces and see how they fit together to develop the whole concept.

Therefore you belong to the following communities:
  • You are a member of the universe.
  • You are a member of the Milky Way Galaxy.
  • You are a member of our Solar System.
  • You are a member of planet earth.
  • You are a member of the Human Race.
  • You are a member of your continent.
  • You are a member of your country.
  • You are a member of your city.
  • You are a member of your neighborhood.
  • You are a member of your school.
  • You are a member of your family.
As a member of a community you have rights and responsibilities.  You also have an obligation to treat the other members of the community with kindness and respect.  One way to head off inevitable disagreements, conflicts, and misunderstandings is to have a community meeting.  At our school we hold community/classroom meeting once each month.  In our classroom we hold a class meeting once each week.  I think once per week is a good start for family meetings.

Here is how to begin using Family Meetings:
  • Choose a time that does not interfere with other activities.  Since children thrive on routine, try to be consistent about the time for your meeting each week.  So if you choose 10am on Sunday, stick to that time.
  • Choose a place to hold the meeting.  It should be comfortable but not too casual, and it should be a neutal spot.  So stay away from bedrooms and offices and think about the dining room table or a den with enough seating for everyone.
  • Turn off the electronics, phones, TV, computers, Ipods, stereos, etc.
  • Have a start time and a finish time.  For example, Our class meetings take place from 3 - 3:30 on Friday afternoons.  So any issues that are not addressed in this timeframe, they are moved to the next week.
  • Put up an AGENDA.  This should be located in a neutal place (on the refidgerator is a good choice).  It should be at a level to which everyone has access.  Community members can sign up if they have an issue they would like to see addressed.
  • When the time for the meeting arrives, gather everyone in the chosen area and call the meeting to order.  You can make a script for each family member to follow when it is his or her turn to be the facilitator.  Here is a sample:
Facilitator:  Welcome to the _________Family Meeting.  Today is July 5, 2011.  The members present are mom, dad, Bob, and Sue.  Today it is mom's turn to be the facilitator.  It is Dad's turn to be the Record Keeper.

I like to have a bell or some other offical sound to call the meeting to order.  The facilitator then gets the agenda.  The Record Keeper should have the Official Notebook with a dated page and a list of the members present.

Facilitator:  There are 3 issues listed on the agenda this week.  Let's review the ground rules for the meeting.
  1. Everyone can participate.
  2. All reasonable ideas will be considered.
  3. Everyone gets a vote.
  4. The Facilitator will ask each person for his or her input, please wait your turn.
  5. Use kind and respectful words when speaking.
The first name on the agenda is Bob, Bob please tell us what your issue is and then we will all come up with ideas to help you resolve it.

Bob states his issue.  In class, we often have the issue of forgetting to flush so let's use that as an example.

Bob: Everytime I use the bathroom, someone has forgotten to flush.
Bob does not accuse anyone of this behavior, he just states the issue.  When doing class meetings we insist that the person on the agenda not use anyone's name in order to be respectful.

Facilitator:  Thank you Bob, does anyone have a reasonable suggestion or idea to help Bob?  Sue, let's start with you.

Sue:  I think we should put a camera in the blathroom to see who is doing this.

Facilitator:  Record Keeper, will you please make a note of this.  Any other ideas?  Dad, would you like to suggest something?

Dad:  Perhaps we can make a sign for the bathroom door that says "Don't forget to flush".

Facilitator:  Thank you, please note that suggestion.  Bob, do you have a suggestion?

Bob:  No, I would like to try the camera idea.

Facilitator:  First let's see if that idea is reasonable.  Raise your hand if you want to be filmed while using the bathroom.  No one raised their hand so this is most likely not a reasonable solution.  How many of you would like to try the "Don't forget to Flush" sign?  Four votes.  Let's try this and see how it is working at our next meeting.  Please make a note of this.

Then move on to the next issue.  It might be a good idea to begin the meetings with older members of the family as the facilitator.

The benefits of a Family or Class meeting are:
  • Everyone gets a vote.
  • Everyone has a say.
  • Everyone can help resolve the issue.
  • The individuals in the family or class are working together for the benefit of the whole group.
  • By helping each other solve issues, harmony, respect, and loyalty can be cultivated.
It may take a while to get into the swing of it.  Families are more likely to run into emotional and dramatic issues, don't be afraid, know that the meeting has an ending time. If you keep your emotions in check you are setting a good example for your family.